Another school year started. Maggie is a senior this year and Bud is right behind as a junior. When they were little, I was always overjoyed at the start of the school year. Now that the kids are older and almost ready to start their own lives, I feel sad that another year has gone. They've become my best friends and I'll be sad to see them go, but excited to see what they become.
This year marked a lot of changes for me. My daughter Jennifer married in January, and in May my second daughter, Jessica, also married. Then in July, my father passed on. Although we didn't see each other often, I will sorely miss my father. He was a gentle man, always kind and helpful. I sit here now, occasionally glancing at the box of books and pictures that I somehow never had time to mail to him. I only hope he knew how much he was appreciated and loved.
I've done a lot of thinking since my father died. Death is always a reminder that we don't have much time to enjoy what is around us or to leave something behind for others to remember us by. I've struggled for so long to make enough money to pay the bills and feed the kids, that I've neglected my own talents. I've also put aside many things that I wanted to do or learn. I realize that this is part of being a parent, but it's also time for me to consider myself and what I want to do when the last child leaves home.
What have I decided to do about all this introspection? Well, I'm working on the real estate course I ordered, but never started. I'm going back to Weight Watchers to lose the "over 40" bulges I've acquired. Also, I'm working harder on finishing up my A.S. degree in Criminal Justice. After all, I only have 3 more classes and one internship to do. The biggest decision I have made is find some way to buy a home. Having my own home has been a dream I've had for years, and one I'm determined to turn into reality. Most of my life has been spent dependent on others and hovering somewhere below "low income". Although I've managed to stave off the welfare system, I've hardly been able to live a worry-free lifestyle.
Now we come to the reason for this site. This is the story of my journeys through life, and what the outcomes have been for me. Perhaps some of you can learn from the mistakes and successes I've had, or you might get a laugh from my misguided efforts to get somewhere in life. Whatever you take from this site, I wish you luck and happiness in your own adventure through life. 25-aug-05